Posted in stuff

2011, You Were A Good One

It’s nearly the end of the universe. 2012 and certain death looms, according to the Mayans, people known for accurate end-of-the-world predictions since, um, well, you know.

Hey, it could happen. Or it could have happened yesterday. The good thing is that it reminds us all to try to live life to the fullest, because you only have a set amount of time to enjoy the party. Whether its a silly Mayan prediction, people standing in the desert waiting for aliens to return, or the number 98 bus, we’ve all got a cosmic sleep number.

I’m not saying this is an excuse to shit-can all your responsibilities. It’s not. However, if your choices are to go outside and look for a rainbow after a freak storm versus not being able to leave the house until you’ve cleaned the oven, you may not be living up to your full potential.

I took some brave (for me) steps this year. I took on three photography jobs from which I would have normally run screaming. I signed up for two dating sites, and actually reached out to men instead of just waiting for them to find me. I went on my first first date in 20 years. I became someone’s girlfriend. I refinanced my house so it’s all my responsibility now. I’m allowing myself to realize I am worthy of love and affection, and damn it, I can be sexy. If I’m not happy, I’d better take action because nobody but me is responsible for my happiness.

2012 has a lot of potential. I plan to travel more, write more, photograph more and laugh more. I am going to try to be a bit more financially responsible, and less irresponsible with my housekeeping. But no promises on either one of those. It is 2012 after all, and I suppose the Mayans could be right about this one thing. If not, there’s always 2013 to clean up the mess.

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Posted in coolness, lists

Christmas Music Purchases: 2011 Edition

I own a ton of Christmas music. I will not apologize for it. I used to have a page on the site that documented it all, with links to Amazon. Back when people used to care about me, my link was on page 1 of the Google results for Charlie Brown Christmas Soundtrack. THAT was how much I ruled the universe.

These days, people don’t need me to find that CD. But, I still have many many (many) fans sitting in their dark and dirty rooms, lit only with the light of a laptop monitor, the buzzing of traffic their only companions, wondering: “For baby Jesus’ sake, WHAT CHRISTMAS MUSIC DID JODY ADD TO HER COLLECTION THIS YEAR??!!”

I will only document complete albums, not individual songs, unless the individual songs are kick-ass. Actually, I’ve downloaded so much free stuff that I don’t know which individual songs are kick-ass yet. (Please, before time runs out, check out the Amazon MP3 site for their 25 free songs – maybe one of them will appeal to you?)

Albums/CDs I purchased this year, in no particular order:

  • Christmas Remixed: Holiday Classics Re-grooved
  • Christmas Cheer – Straight No Chaser
  • Cello Music For Christmas – The Christmas Cello
  • Merry Flippin’ Christmas Vol 1 and 2 – Bowling for Soup
  • This is Christmas – Emmy the Great and Tim Wheeler

So the musical Christmas spirit is alive and well Chez Dump. Keep on singing!

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Posted in poetry

Pretend

Happy chatter
strangers
I smile, pretend
I feel a part of things
though I do not
Your effort to draw me in
fails
and I’m more aware of our differences
I long to remove myself
from the awkwardness
but circumstances hold me hostage
Just another 20 minutes
Just another 10
Three hours of pacing before I can flee
free to return to the familiar
the safe places
where I don’t have to
pretend

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Posted in complaint department

Ho Ho Ho Hum

Dear Jody,

What the hell? You love Christmas. You love everything about it. You have a blood-lust for Christmas music. Your iPod currently has 800+ holiday songs on it. You love twinkly stuff, anything snowman-shaped, and literally ANYTHING that lights up. Christmas is all about that stuff. So what’s going on? Why are there no Department 56 Houses set up? Where is the Lego train that it took two people a million hours to assemble? Where are the damned decorations and the angel on the tree?

I’m going to give you 20 minutes to write another post that oozes holiday spirit. This funk you’re in? Cut it the hell out. You’re better than that. WAY better than that. The things you think are missing from your Christmas? You’re imagining all that. So get your head out of your ass and Christmas the hell out of your life!

Love,

Me

 

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