The Big DumpTruck

Throwing Little Thought Pebbles at Your Windshield Since 1996

Tag: politics

Oh, That Would Be My Luck

You know, this is why I don’t go skydiving. You can ask anyone, my sister, my husband…whenever we do something, I’m the one who gets the screwy equipment, or has the weird things happen. So if we all went skydiving, I would be the one with the dead instructor strapped to me.

I feel horrible for both people – especially the poor guy who died at 49(!) but really, that is just the kind of thing that keeps me from jumping out of a plane. Well, that and the fact that I would crap my pants if I had to jump out of a perfectly good plane.

In other airplane news, I finally got around to watching the National Geographic Channel special on Air Force One, and I now officially want to be President of the United States cause I really want to travel on that plane. It is sweeeeeeeeet! And the food looks pretty good too. Sure, there would be the pesky “leader of the free world” job responsibility crap, but it’s got beds! And a nice office for me! And they would give me a jacket with my name embroidered on it!

Welcome, Number 44

You know, if they could have just moved the inauguration to yesterday, or MLK day to today, I would have been able to join in the celebration of the transition from President #43 to President #44. However, I have to work, and at work, I had a noon meeting scheduled. I could have blown off that meeting, but I think #44 would not want me to prefer leisure over work (his words).

So back to the grind, jealous of anyone who didn’t have a noon meeting. You are all stinky poo-poo heads.

Thank You For Thinking About Voting

To be fair, this guy has every right to choose to vote the way he ended up voting. On the other hand, the reason bothers me. A lot. Without giving away the plot, I think it’s pretty interesting that he got to be as old as he is and was honestly surprised when the kindly people at the polling places had to set him straight.

Courtesy of C.Monks.

I’m Tired of Politics

It’s taking away from my arguing about watching baseball time. Debate #2. It’s okay, but when is John McCain going to start swearing under his breath again? I want him to start walking around pretending to karate chop while Senator Obama is talking. I need some craziness to entertain me, dammit!

Brilliant writing example

This is a hilarious article that takes Hillary’s past approach to the primaries and applies it to basketball.

http://blogs.tnr.com/tnr/blogs/the_plank/archive/2008/06/03/a-sports-parable.aspx

Enjoy.

Me and My Wide Stance

Senator Craig says he has a wide stance, and that’s why when he sits on the toilet in a men’s room, his foot goes all the way under the door and touches the foot of the person sitting next to him.

I have to tell you, I tried to do this at work (the other stall was empty) and I almost fell off the toilet.

I am starting to think that maybe, just maybe, Senator [as of this minute] Craig may just be creating what we at the Dump House like to call “a story.” Every once in a while Junior tries to pass off a story to cover up whatever he is doing/has done and my standard response is “do I look stupid to you?” That’s the point where he comes clean.

I’m thinking that I should start writing outright lies about my life. You know, to spice things up. And if anyone calls me on it, I’ll explain it’s because I have a wide stance.