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My Stupid Boring July

I have reached the alarmed point in the summer…July is almost over, all 500 days of it, and I have not yet done anything X-treme. As you all know, normally by now I have done enough X-treme activities that I am left happy and content for the rest of the year. But I have not jumped off any buildings, ridden any rocket sleds, or roller bladed down an interstate holding on to the back of a semi. None of those things. No being shot out of a cannon, flagpole sitting or being set on fire for a movie stunt. Nothing. I have done the drone-like “go to work” thing and then the “go watch your kid play baseball” thing, but at no point did I wrestle sharks or attach balloons to a lawn chair and to go for a celestial spin.
I feel like the entire month of July was just a waste, and now I’m going to be all mopey because that’s a month I’ll never ever get back. I completely blew it.

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Best Free iPhone Application

Everyone out there is posting stuff about iPhone applications, so I thought I should do the same because if you know me, you know I like to be completely and utterly trendy. It’s almost a genetic thing. That and my need to wear comfortable shoes. Now I can already hear you saying “but Jody, the need to be completely trendy and the need to wear comfortable shoes cancel each other out!” You know, for some people, that would be true. But I can be completely trendy AND wear comfortable shoes and they do NOT cancel each other out. That’s how awesome I am.

So here is my pick for the absolute best free iPhone app. The runners-up, More Cowbell and SimStapler, were very worthy opponents. I’m guessing tens of thousands of people out there did not know they needed an iPhone application that allowed them to make a cowbell sound, followed by Christopher Walken saying “I need more cowbell”.

As for SimStapler, well, where else can you go if you have an urgent need to pretend to staple something? Nowhere I tell you! SimStapler does it all! It pretends to staple, and keeps count of how many pretend staples you’ve done! Perfect!

But to get all serious, the true winner here, in the “I can’t believe it’s free” category, is AOL Radio. All kidding aside, this app (which I’ve run on Mr. Dump’s 1st generation iPhone so it doesn’t need the 3G) gives you access to dozens of radio stations, to listen to live over your iPhone. There are some custom AOL set up stations (comedy, trance, and my favorites, One Hit Wonders and All 80s.) If you hear something you like, you can mark it as a favorite and/or go pull it up in AOL Music (where you can learn more about the song/artist) or iTunes to buy it. You can set favorite stations to find them quickly. And big bonus, it carries some terrestrial local stations, so you can listen to WBCN anywhere.

There are some limitations if you aren’t on wifi or 3g, according to the iTunes site, but don’t let that stop you. If you have an iPhone and haven’t grabbed AOL Radio, go do it now.

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Two More Truths and One More Lie

I apologize for the missing blog posts. I was, uh….passed out from being closed up in a room with too much writing on the white boards. Which is not entirely untrue. I was closed up in a room, and there was too much writing, but most of it was on those ginormous Post-It Flip Charts.

Note to the white board marker people: There is no need to add scent to these things. The black marker doesn’t smell like chocolate mint. Please just stop it.

So the other day I thought of a “truth” that I figured nobody would buy. Those are the good ones, aren’t they? The problem is coming up with the other truth and the lie, enough to make them all sound plausible. Ready? Here we go.

1. I own four pair of green pants.
2. The song listed as having the most plays on my iPod is “Banjo Boy”.
3. My boss’s boss squeezed my “squishy stress dog” so hard it exploded on him, covering him with pink liquid.

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Homemade Kitt


Kitt, originally uploaded by Big DumpTruck.

Is there anything more one needs to say about a hand-made version of Kitt? The lights were on in front and it was talking to us. It sounded like William Daniels, but I don’t know if it was. I think it would be funny to load it up with stuff Daniels said on a show other than Knight Rider, like St. Elsewhere and Saved by the Bell…

The Spinners game was great – a very close game that almost went into extra innings but for a lovely sacrifice fly that meant we got to go home before the clouds that threatened us all evening finally broke open. It literally did not start to rain until we got in the car, which made the whole endeavor a complete success.

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Two Truths and a Lie

It’s everybody’s favorite way to spend Thursday afternoon…two truths and a lie! In no particular order:

  • I have an endless loop video of the gerbils running on a photo frame in my cubicle.
  • I used the last square of toilet paper this morning
  • I was given a pyramid paperweight at work yesterday.

Additionally, the following is true: I just took my shoes off because I was wearing kicky little sandals that effectively destroyed the side of my pinky toe. I brought some Keds with me in a bag and I put them on, even though I’m not supposed to wear sneakers at work. I have decided that no matter what happens, I’m not going to leave my cube for the rest of the day so that it won’t be an issue.

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