The Big DumpTruck

I accidentally purchased the wrong thing at the store last week. I meant to buy little cups of peaches for Junior to take in his lunch, but what I grabbed was the little mandarin orange cups. Same color, wrong fruit.

I took one to work with me today to see what they are like. And now I will pass the savings on to you.

They aren’t “oh kill me now” bad, but there is something seriously wrong with buying these. For one thing, they’re packed in the same “syrup” as peaches. So you’ve got your strong, sweet [peachy] juice. I drank that right out of the cup because I didn’t want to walk all the way to the cafeteria to get a spoon, so I have to pick out the oranges with my fingers.

Somehow, picking one of them up makes me feel like I’m on Fear Factor eating sea slugs or something. They are a really floppy consistency, and kind of soft. I do think eating bugs would feel a lot like this. Also, they don’t really taste like oranges. I assume floating in peach syrup will do that to you. So in conclusion, why the hell wouldn’t you just buy a few actual mandarin oranges? This is NOT the way to go, on any planet.

Mmm. Sea slugs.

Okay, so it’s only a partial meat review, because I only tried one thing so far, but I have my review of the new butcher shop on Central Street.

Sausages – B+
These are actually very good, but I can only give them a B+ because even though I bought sweet sausage I found that my mouth was burning a bit. I can’t even imagine what the hot sausage is like. Mr. Dump approved of them because they weren’t full of fennel, which he personally doesn’t like. Junior ate a couple of bites too, so that’s a plus. Anything he eats more than one bite of has to be good.

Marinated Steak Tips – Not Graded yet
I picked up a pound of the marinated steak tips to try out. I should have bought more than a pound because I can imagine my family will be fighting over them, but at $8.99 a pound I really couldn’t afford to get more than that. I look at it this way…if they are good, we can go back and get more (they are open Saturday and Sunday, 9-6 and 9-5). If they aren’t good, well, I’m only out 8.99.

Junior wanted me to buy a steak (who is this kid?) but I told him we had enough for two days (more, because I bought extra sausage to freeze) and I didn’t want to buy an expensive steak and have it sit in the fridge. It looked damned good, though.

And the cool thing was how the butcher seemed to know everyone by name. Junior was disappointed he didn’t know us, but as I pointed out, we’d never been in before. So thanks to the South Leominster folks who pointed out this new shop. Oh, and I look forward to seeing what Athens Pizza puts on the menu of their new location in Johnny Appleseed Plaza. It’s Mr. Dump’s favorite pizza (the one in North Leominster), but he is concerned that the brother (owner) who makes the best pizza is going to be sent to work over there, leaving the other brother in “our” location. That will definitely be bad because we’re take-out people and that is too far to drive.

Should I really blame myself? I mean, I understand that I don’t spend as much time driving around town as I should, and I don’t subscribe to the local paper, but shouldn’t there be a better way to let people know that a big town celebration is coming up? Signs or something?

I do read the only version of the local paper, but usually only the news section. You know when I’ll read about this in the news section? After it’s over. That’s when I always read about things there. The few times I read the events section they list things that are already over. I’m not a fan of the paper.

Sometimes we learn about things from flyers coming home from school with Junior, which I appreciate. That’s how we hear about Sholan Farm activities.

But if the whole point is to get maximum attendance, why not put some effort into letting people know it’s happening?

So we found out about this because we heard the fireworks. So we missed out and they missed out on selling me stuff. All because I don’t subscribe to the paper, their online version doesn’t even bother letting folks know on the main page, and I don’t happen to drive through downtown, where I’m sure there is a sign. All my fault.

Okay, so the label on my Diet Pepsi says “1 in 3 gets a ringtone” but darn it, I’ve entered 6 codes now and not only have I not gotten 2 ringtones, I haven’t even gotten one. Now don’t go on and on with all your math and probability and statistics. I don’t care. It says 1 in 3 and I have actually been told I’m 1 in a Million, so how many ringtones does THAT get me? On the other hand, my phone (the T-Mobile Sidekick) can’t use your nasty old ringtones anyway, so get them away from me. I am, of course, hoping I win the Motorola phone because then I could use the nasty old ringtones. So here I sit, ringtoneless, and now I don’t even have any Diet Pepsi left. What a stinker.

I don’t think I mentioned it here, but we took Phantom for a haircut, and apparently the woman who took our call couldn’t hear Mr. Dump very well.

Him: Phantom.
Her: Manta?
Him: No, Phantom.
Her: Oh, I thought you said Manta! Ha ha ha.

When I got there they couldn’t find his appointment in the book….because it was under “Santa.” Ooookay. So you know what that means? That means we’re going to start calling him Santa. Because we do that. It starts as a joke and gets all out of control.

The last time we got him groomed (at a different place) we told the girl his name and she asked if we ever call him “Fanny”. Mr. Dump and I exchanged looks. “Uh, no. He’s a boy.”

But guess what I call him now? Because of course I started to do it to mock the dog groomer. Worse, it’s evolved to “Fanny Banana”. Please, if I ever complain that the dog doesn’t listen to me, point out that I’m an idiot.

Jody
mom to Santa Fanny Banana who wasn’t feeling well at ALL today because he got three shots on Monday but now he’s at least a little better, according to Grandma who is watching him today. Heh.