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Me and My Wide Stance

Senator Craig says he has a wide stance, and that’s why when he sits on the toilet in a men’s room, his foot goes all the way under the door and touches the foot of the person sitting next to him.

I have to tell you, I tried to do this at work (the other stall was empty) and I almost fell off the toilet.

I am starting to think that maybe, just maybe, Senator [as of this minute] Craig may just be creating what we at the Dump House like to call “a story.” Every once in a while Junior tries to pass off a story to cover up whatever he is doing/has done and my standard response is “do I look stupid to you?” That’s the point where he comes clean.

I’m thinking that I should start writing outright lies about my life. You know, to spice things up. And if anyone calls me on it, I’ll explain it’s because I have a wide stance.

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Is This Candid Camera?

(You young people might not catch this reference. So I think maybe I could call this post “Am I Being Punked?”)

Yesterday was one of those days. Mr. Dump had an appointment for a small surgical procedure, and I had an appointment with my doctor. I also had Junior (I have him again today…last two days before school starts so no more camp). I used up a tank of gas just driving around from appointment to appointment yesterday. Junior got an invite to his friend’s house, but she lives in Gardner, so that was 20+ minutes each way. What was great, though, is that it meant someone was watching him while I was in my appointment.

After Mr. Dump was out of recovery and I settled him back in at home, I went back to Gardner to get Junior. We decided to stop at the Hannaford at Twin City Mall on the way home to get something for dinner. While standing with my cart trying to think of the other things I wanted to buy (iced tea and potato rolls) a guy was standing about 6 feet to my right. I catch some activity out of the corner of my eye and see…a copy handcuffing him. Nothing was being said, it was all very quiet. I quickly made sure Junior was still standing behind me (and wasn’t planning to scoot around the cart over to where this was happening. I could feel my blood pressure go up 20 points. I made eye contact with a couple of people standing in the 12 items or less line (which is what we were standing near) and we all had this “Are you kidding me?” look on our faces.

I can honestly say I have never stood that close to someone being arrested. I mean, to the point that I felt like I was assisting the cop…that’s how close they were to me. Junior kind of took the whole thing in stride, like this stuff happens all the time. Maybe I should ask more questions about what goes on a summer camp!

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Mostly Monday

Sorry for the lack of posting. Did you notice? I was giving myself a little break from the computer, and when you do that, well, all hell breaks loose.

I could blame it on the Red Sox sweeping the White Sox in grand style. I mean really, if we can’t win 30-3 in one game, we could have four 10+ games in a row. I’m okay with that, really I am. If you’re looking for more in-depth analysis, of course, I defer to my resident expert over at Red Sox Soul. I’m just a back seat driver when it comes to this stuff.

School starts this week, and I think we’re more nervous and excited about it than Junior is. He’s moving to the LEAP program at the newly re-designed Southeast Math and Science Elementary school. We’re bummed about leaving JA and all his best friends there, but I think this is going to be an amazing year for him. One way or another.

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Stupid Email Server Software

I have to open a ticket with my hosting company because for some reason, I cannot change the setting on the server that allows me to tell it to delete mail after I download it to my pop3 account. In summary, my mailbox was full with messages that I had read months ago.

Grrr.

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All Full Up, Tinky Winky

I haven’t uploaded any more of the 700 or so photos I took last week because, interestingly, the hard drive on my Mac became full. That causes two problems. I can’t burn DVDs without having buffer space on the hard drive (a 4.7 gig DVD needs 4.7 gig on the hard drive, etc.) and moving things off the hard drive messes with LightRooms head, because it can’t find files it previously imported. Oh, and you need buffer space on the hard drive to edit photos, too.

I picked up a 500gig external drive at Best Buy for $119 yesterday (tax free, on sale) and I’m moving things off the Mac hard drive slowly but surely. Actually, I have no idea how I filled up the hard drive that quickly. I mean, other than something simple like shooting approximately 10gig of photos in a week. Not counting all the photos I took before last week. Hmmm.

So while we wait for me to go through the rest of the photos, I’ll take a moment to give quality feedback about last night’s showing of Grease on Nickelodeon. I liked that movie a lot when it came out a million years ago. It hardly even bothered me that high school senior Rizzo was played by a 34 year old woman. Hell, Olivia Newton John was 29. John Travolta was 24. But that’s not my complaint. My complaint (no, not the fact that “You’re the One That I Want” is now stuck in my head) is all the smoking. This movie used smoking to show that the characters were “bad” and “cool” all at the same time. You know Danny’s a bad-ass when school starts because he turns around from talking to three middle-aged high school girls and there’s a butt hanging off his lower lip. I wanted Junior to watch this movie because I remembered it one way. But his first comment was “Why are they smoking?” Sure, it’s set in 1959, and maybe smoking was actually allowed on campus back then, but good Lord, even Sandy pulls on a butt (amateurishly) in the final carnival scene to show that she’s no longer a goodie-two-shoes. What the hell? And now that I’m an old lady myself, what the hell is wrong with being a goodie-two-shoes? Why can’t we keep the Pollyanna version of Sandy and the lettermen sweater version of Danny at the end?

I still like the movie, and other than that (and the Rizzo pregnancy scare) it is a fun movie with good songs. And it’s fun to show the boy what High School Musical was based on. But with someone smoking in literally EVERY scene of this movie, I’m questioning if it belonged on the Nick at Night lineup at 8pm. Call me a prude, but it was a bit much, even for me.

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