Author: The Jody

I stopped at Target on my way to work this morning, because I thought it would be more efficient for me to stop before work than to leave in the middle of the day. I can’t go at the end of the day because I have to pick up Junior by 5:30pm or incur the wrath of the daycare people.

It was a good decision. When I saw the parking lot, I thought “Oh, crap, they aren’t open yet.” I did the slow cruise by the door to see the hours. Huh. They were open already! Duuuude! I was one of maybe 6 cars in the lot (not in the area where the employees were obviously parking). I had the whole place to myself!

Now I’m not telling you WHICH Target, because I don’t want you people ruining a good thing for me. But hey, I got in and out as fast as humanly possible, given that I had to look for something in the corner of the store furthest from the door, and it’s a very large store.

If Natalie can tell you about her bad dreams, so can I!

Okay, so there were two of them. One was a pretty standard bad dream. The other is a bad dream because it made me think there is something wrong with my psychologically. You get to decide which is which.

1. Someone broke into the house and stole all the cool stuff – the computers, the television, anything electronic. At some point during the dream it went from being our house to this sort of condo complex that was under construction, and apparently the door being open for the workers was the security flaw. I woke up thinking “Man, I really need to do another backup on the laptop hard drive.”

2. I was writing a screenplay. Actually, it was going to be The Beverly Hillbillies reconfigured as a dark, serious drama. Same characters, but none of the funny (I mean, if you thought the original was funny. And not funny in a “why does the lesbian secretary have a thing for Jethro?” way.)

So I woke up trying to figure out if it’s a brilliant idea to take old sitcoms and turn them into dramas or not. I have no idea what the licensing would be like, but it’s an interesting though. But the Beverly Hillbillies? Yeesh.

I realized that DirecTV’s Freeview channel was showing Blue Man Group’s “The Complex” in concert…oh my God, I could watch them for hours and hours. If I could see a Stomp/Blue Man Group double-bill, I could die happy.

So now I have the show and the songs (specifically the one Dave Matthews does on the CD) stuck in my head – which means it’s pretty bouncy and happy in there. I just think it’s cool that we got to see an hour and a half of this excellent show for free! I realize it’s a marketing dealie for BMG, but hey, I’m now going to buy the CD, so I think it’s a pretty successful marketing campaign.

“If I sing a song, will you sing along?

Or should I just keep singing right here by myself? “

Are we expecting a blizzard? The first sign of trouble was the total chaos in the parking lot. I grabbed a cart that was in the corner of the space I grabbed. Good thing, because when we got inside the store there were no carts to be found. And people standing there dumbly waiting for someone to magically hand one to them. I smirked at one woman, because I had watched her walk by the one that was in “my spot” and I had silently cursed her for not taking it and making it easier for me to park. I don’t get people who don’t grab a cart out of the middle of the lot on the way in. Do yourself and everyone a favor and pitch in.

I should have turned around when I saw the lines, but sometimes when the lines are horrendous, by the time you’re done shopping, things are back to normal. Well not so today. In fact, some women had apparently formed some little pre-line line. I didn’t know that’s what it was so I walked by it. I’ve shopped at that store for over 10 years now, this was something I had never seen before. Some older woman yelled at the guy behind me that there was a line. I can’t repeat what he muttered under his breath.

Oh well, we got out with our lives and a hundred dollars worth of food that probably won’t even make meals for the rest of the week. I have a bad habit of not wanting to make dinner, so I don’t buy stuff I need to make dinner. But I’m aware of it, so that’s half the solution to the problem, right?

Start by saying “diet be damned” and have donuts for breakfast. You heard me. Extra points if you live near a Krispy Kreme, which I do not.

I’ll let you know about the rest once I figure it out.