Author: The Jody

Good God, my stomach is making noises that it should not. I don’t think I’m hungry, which means the noises are scarier in nature. As in “oh my God, what’s going to come shooting out of me?” But they sound like hunger growls. As a preventive measure, I bought some Rolaids and popped a couple. You know, in case the noises are gassy in nature. Is this too much information for you? I apologize. I know how delicate all your constitutions are.

Been a busy week at work and at home, so I apologize in advance for my low profile. Well, that and MY STOMACH MAKING NOISES LIKE A BULLDOZER which isn’t as low profile as I’d like. Also, please do not mix cherry Rolaids with a sip of lime Poland Spring Sparkling Water, for all that is good in the world. Just don’t.

Gah.

If I’m not mistaken, last night I dreamt about bacon. Of all the meats in the pork family, bacon is the best, so don’t you even try to go there Miss Sausage Patty or Mr. Ham. In heaven, the streets will be paved with bacon, and you’ll be able to just pick up pieces and eat it and you won’t get sick because you’re already dead, duh, and any holes you make from pigging out (heh) will just be immediately re-filled with more bacon.

And it will be the crisp kind, the kind that crumbles in your mouth. None of that chewy fatty bacon. They’re saving that kind for purgatory. (If you end up in hell, you only get the smell of bacon, but you never get to eat any. That and the smell of raisin toast. And coffee. Oh ya, all those smells and none to eat. That is definitely what hell will be like.)

You can quote me on that.

Not what I’ve donated to various relief efforts, although give me another week at it should be about that much, I suspect.

No, that’s how much I spent getting the Batmobile fixed this morning. Apparently, I had a frozen brake caliper or something like that. Brake calipers are ‘spensive, by the way. And installing them is ‘spensive. 368 spensive. Man oh man. I’m headed out to just drive around slamming on the brakes.

You did a heck of a job, Brownie.

A heck of a bad job.

Hey, all, it’s payday again! Time to fire up the old checkbook. So far I’ve given to the Red Cross, sent craft supplies to CoffeeCup, and helped pull together 15 backpacks heading down to Houston today.

My first donation of the day is to an effort for some of the kids in a shelter in Alabama…this grassroots effort is culminating in the kids being taken to a KBToys in the local mall so they can pick out what they want from the store themselves. I love the whole thing, and I love that the focus reminds us that it isn’t just the folks from New Orleans who had their lives destroyed by Katrina.

More info about this effort is here: . And thanks to J-Mo for pointing out this great effort on her blog.

p.s. Last day on the current contract, new one starts Monday. I “celebrated” by ordering a side of bacon in the cafeteria. They have the best best best bacon here. I will truly miss it.

p.s. More great pictures of the CoffeeCup efforts on their website (the link is above my menu bar). They also say the following: “There is a great need for long distance calling cards, wrist watches, battery powered clocks, ethnic hair care products, school supplies, backpacks and other luggage.”