Author: The Jody

I was only half-listening to a radio commercial for a grocery store, and I thought I heard the guy say that haddock loins were on sale. Is a haddock really big enough that you can sell just the loins? I have to assume I misheard, but maybe I didn’t. So, can anyone fill me in on the whole haddock loin conundrum? I’m not losing sleep over it, but still…

Thanks to faithful reader Anji, who is apparently good with paying attention to details, pointed out in a comment that this is the year the Dump turns 10. Good God! TEN!

Actually, I don’t have the official first date, because the early pages of the site have been lost to history. I did try to find them in the web archive, but they don’t exist. The earliest versions were part of Tripod, actually, back when they were one of the few sites to give away free web space (but prior to them getting all ad-happy). I cannot remember what my site’s old URL was, so I don’t think I’ll ever find it. I’m sure it was a work of art.

The earliest file available in my archives is July 9th, 1996, but I know I had stuff before then. I actually assume the blog’s birthday is in 1995. I just don’t have any way to determine when the actual birthdate is. So….July 9th it is! Keep your eyes and ears peeled for more funtastic birthday excitement!

(And if anyone can find any proof/content from prior to that date, I have a big old prize waiting for you.)

Following up on yesterday’s ‘roid rage post, I had to call the eye doctor this morning because of lingering issues with my left eye ever since having the stupid viral infection last month. Old Lefty has periodically felt icky, or felt like there was grit or an eyelash under my eyelid. Reminiscent of the infection, really, but it would only last for about 15 minutes and then I wouldn’t feel it again for a day or so. Two nights ago Lefty started experiencing a “halo” effect whenever I look at a light. I first noticed it when looking at the red light that tells you a burner is hot on the stove. Last night it was really noticeable on the drive home…annoying in fact. The right eye is fine, it’s just the left one bothering me.

So I called the doctor who was taking care of me (who I love, by the way…he’s wonderful, but his official title at the practice is “Clinical Director of Refractive Surgery” so I’m not sure why he got stuck dealing with me, eye infection girl) and he says it can really take weeks for the eye to heal after an infection and this is likely all part of that same infection. He also mentioned for the first time that the last time I went in and he looked at my eye, it looked like it had “hundreds of tiny pinholes on it” which would all have to heal. Oh my God, I didn’t need to hear that.

So I can call him back in a few days if there’s no improvement, but I’m supposed to just use some of those over the counter dry eye drops, so no repeat on my ‘roid rage. But now I’ve got the whole pinhole thing in my head. Eyes are freaky. Cool, but freaky.

I am a little worried that someone is going to write a tell-all book that will expose my ‘roid use. That’s right, I’ve been using steroids to enhance my blogging. I mostly used them to take care of my eye infection, but I can’t help it if it really beefed up my finger muscles and made the the plates in my skull shift. I don’t know what that means but I’m pretty sure it happened.

Damn those steroid eye drops! Now they may pull my membership from the Blog Hall of Fame…

Hey, it’s Happy Feet LaFerriere here.

Unlike some women, I don’t own 400 pair of shoes (*winks at Christine*). Well, I have a lot of shoes that I never wear because they don’t fit or they are old but I have this thing in the part of my brain where all the imprinting occured that prevents me from throwing out clothing. It’s a sin, I think. There are naked people out there waiting for clothes from me. But because I never get around to piling it all in bags and dropping it off, it sits in the closet forever. Stuff I will never ever ever ever wear again. But it has to stay in the closet until I process it because I’m pretty sure my mom will know the moment I drop a pair of pants in the trash.

Mom: Jody?
Jody: Yes?
Mom: There was a tremor on the Bat-monitor. What did you just do?
Jody: [pause] Nothing.
Mom: Try again.
Jody: [longer pause]: Nothing.
Mom: I’m your mother. Tell me what you just did.
Jody: I threw away a pair of pants.
Mom: I’ll be right there.

This is my excuse for why my house is such a mess. We can’t throw anything away, ever. We either have to donate it or have a yard sale. So technically, the crap that’s everywhere is just waiting for a yard sale. Ya, that’s it. That’s the reason.

I’m going to drag a bunch of stuff down to the sidewalk and put a sign on it that says “Free to a good home”. Maybe the guy who pulls all the cans out of my recycle bin would like a Hot Wheels Speedway.

And then, there’s Junior, who won’t play with something for 40 years, so I decide to get rid of it, and he pulls it out and plays with it. Yesterday he amused himself with a toy I thought we’d already given away, a Power Rangers Command Center thingy. I don’t even know where he got it, but suddenly my kitchen floor (which I washed Friday night, thank you very much) was covered with Power Ranger crap. Oh, and before that he took a big cardboard box and had me cut it so that he could make cubicle walls. He was pretending to work in an office. How sad is that? It was funny to listen to them talk on the phone in “business-speak”. He adopted this odd accent and was referring to himself in the 3rd person. I think I’ll try that at my meeting this afternoon.

So wait, where was I going with this? Oh, I picked up 2 new pair of shoes over the weekend, which is amazing for me. I have been known to wear the same shoes for years. But with my birthday money from mom, I was supposed to buy two pair (because I kept saying “I need to get a new pair of shoes). I got one, a pair of Clarks clogs. Saturday we were in Wrentham and they have a Clarks outlet store. It was all I could do to not buy the place out. I got two pair of clogs/mules and a pair of sandels, because we mustn’t forget that it will be sandel weather in mere weeks. Oh, and I got my step-daughter a pair of the same sandels. Which means that I picked out something that wasn’t dorky because she wanted a pair. I’m so proud of me!