Month: September 2003

What the? Not two minutes after posting that, I got some spam mail. The subject line? “Jody-the bear facts (cave)”

I mean, really, I thought it was fan mail. Well, it was about Viagra, so maybe it wasn’t.

Oh my goodness, my Aunt (she of the chicken thigh recipe) just emailed that there was a black bear in their backyard at 5:15pm. AHHHH! She lives about 3 miles from here, as the crow flies, or as the bear walks. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

(I wonder if they got a photo?)

We went to the library last night (the Ritter Memorial, but it’s not for John Ritter even if he did do the voice of Clifford the Big Red Dog) and I grabbed two paperbacks off the rack. One of them, and I won’t name it because I don’t want to give the mistaken impression that others should find the book in an effort to emulate me, is bad. Really bad. I glanced at the blurbs last night when I opened the book and I immediately thought “OH NO!” Yes, I picked out a book that has been praised by non other than the AOL Writers Club Romance Group. Oh no.

I decided to start reading anyway. The plot? A mom fakes heart trouble to force one of her three kids to settle down and give her a grandchild. And the kids fall for it and when I just stopped reading they were tossing a coin to figure out who was going to give up his life for the whim of their lying sack of poop mother. Great, huh?

Thanks to my friend Jane for pointing out a little something I think my niece should have. I think everyone should have Romance Novel Barbie!

Heard on the news this morning that the people who are in charge of saying this sort of thing (FEMA? Duracell?) have told folks in the mid-Atlantic states to stock up on batteries, non-perishable foods, candles and portable radios, cause the Hurricane is headed their way. I was thinking I’d still be able to use my “Y2K / 9-11” supply of bottled water and Beefaroni. Did folks throw out their portable radios and duct tape? I kept mine. I even have a solar one, so I don’t need batteries. But I’ve had it for several years now. I don’t need to run out and buy one.

Plus, I’m sure that by the time we get anything from this storm up here, it will just be a tropical depression (“Aloha! Have some Wellbutrin!”) and I’ll be pissed because I’ll have spend a fortune on candles and have no reason to light them. So maybe I’ll just take my chances and not stock up on batteries and candles. I figure if the electricity goes out, I’ll just go to bed earlier than normal.

See, I have an emergency plan!

1. Eat Beefaroni.

2. Go to bed early.