The Big DumpTruck

Throwing Little Thought Pebbles at Your Windshield Since 1996

What If I’m Attacked By Wasps?

I tried my son’s shampoo today. It’s kid’s shampoo – watermelon “flavored”. I thought it might be a good idea because, well, it was 6 o’clock in the morning and that’s the kind of decision I make without coffee.

It was sweet smelling. Not so much like watermelon as just sugary watermelon syrup smell. I started to think about it – putting sugar on my head might not be a good idea. What if I get attacked by wasps today? I mean, have you ever seen them around a soda can? My head is like a giant invitation!

Now I’m going to have to wear a bag over my head to keep the wasps away. Suave really should have put that warning on the side of the bottle.

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  1. Shampoo? Try strawberry Suave conditioner some day – it completely overrides the vanilla-tea Vo5 shampoo you will, of course, have used first.

    I’m very fruity right now.

  2. Just a spritz of Raid behind each ear will solve the problem.

  3. I have the opposite problem. I think they should make manly-man shampoos. What guy wants to smell like lilacs all day? I want my hair to smell like asphalt!