The Big DumpTruck

Throwing Little Thought Pebbles at Your Windshield Since 1996

Month: April, 2006

I Was Abducted by Space Aliens

No, really, I was. I swear. And I have photographic proof. Well, actually, a Quicktime movie. Postcards From Space

And did a single one of you try to save me? No.

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Getting Ready To Go

Vacation is over and I’m totally bummed. We’re in the car heading to the airport. I can’t think of a way to extend things any longer so I guess I’ll just pout a little.

I refuse to even look at the weather reports for Leominster. I don’t wanna know.

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Where Be She?

I’m out right now, but if you leave your name and number at the tone, I’ll get back to you.

Can you believe how hot it is? I had to break out the spf 50 today!

Did I forget to mention I’m in Florida?

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Want to be a Rock Star?

You can take a few lessons from these guys when it’s time to make your music video.

Words can’t do it justice. When I grow up, I want to be a backup dancer.

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New Chimpy Goodness

I have added a new widget to the blog, over on the right. The Chimp-O-Matic is a George Bush quote generator. Ahh, that’s good stuff. Nothing like reading the brilliant words that fall from W’s lips like so many deep fried pork rinds.

Okay, so see Christine, I’m still alive and kicking!

Mostly alive. Not so much kicking. Don’t want to throw out my back.

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Wait, Where Are My Posts?

Is it just me or did some of my content disappear? Wasn’t I talking about taxes and stuff on Tuesday?

Sure, I’ve been busy, but not THAT busy.

Up to my eyeballs at work this week. Good thing I can breath through the little straw they gave me.

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No Relief in Sight

The inside of my nose is itchy, so if I seem distracted this morning, it’s because it’s driving me crazy. I don’t really know what else I can do, other than squirting lotion or something in there. In order to scratch the itch, I look like I’m picking my nose, so I’m trying to avoid doing that. I have no idea what caused the irritation that makes it itchy, but I’m willing to offer my nose a dollar if it will just stop it.

Other than the itchy nose…

Oh, I thought this was interesting. Yesterday I sent Mr. Dump to the Leominster Post Office to mail out our taxes. See, nobody can point and call me a slacker. I don’t wait for the last day to mail MY taxes. (They were done a few weeks ago, but I was in no hurry to mail out the checks.) We had a bunch of stamps at home so we just loaded up the envelopes, but I wanted him to give them to a person instead of a mailbox. That always makes me feel better. So around 7pm, he went inside to hand them to the lady at the counter. And she told him that in her whole 12 hour shift so far, he was literally the first person to hand her stuff to mail to the IRS. As in, nobody else walked in even to have their envelopes metered. What? How can he be the FIRST person to mail his taxes inside the post office the whole day? She said that because of him she lost a bet (I assume that nobody would be mailing their taxes inside the post office yesterday.)

Well, her theory is more people are doing electronic filing, but my theory is that they will be arriving in droves today.

So tell me…did you mail your taxes? And if so, did you just pop them in a mailbox, or did you go into a branch of the Post Office and hand them to someone (either because you needed to weigh them, or because you’re paranoid like me)?

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Dear Journalists…

I’ve been following the horrible unspeakable story of Kevin Ray Underwood, the man who killed his 10 year old neighbor. He was a blogger. Who isn’t? But I noticed that they said he’d joked about cannibalism in his profile, and it got me wondering about that. So I did a search and found his blogspot blog. The thing that they keep quoting is “If you were a cannibal, what would you wear to dinner? The skin of last night’s main course. ” The point being “oh, look, he talked about cannibalism in public!” But wait just a minute…that part of his profile, the question, that’s generated by BLOGGER. He didn’t make the question up, he just answered it. Everyone with a Blogger profile answers a question. Now they can reject questions until they find one they want to answer, so he DID choose it, but if you search for just the question – there are whole bunches of people who answered it in the profile.

So should we do a pre-emptive strike and arrest all of them? Should we arrest the folks at Blogger for making up the question? Okay, maybe that’s not the real point, but I trusted the journalists that he was talking about this stuff on his blog when I found out where it appeared. A quick check of his site shows the most recent stuff is just links out to news articles and other websites that he found interesting. I didn’t see anything (on the home page) that would make me wonder about this guy. Jumping to conclusions about the profile question and answer? Not a good idea. On the other hand, how many people are changing their profiles so they don’t have that question any more?

My question, by the way, is the “Why does the color blue mean raspberry-flavored?”

So, journalists, why don’t we get out there and make sure we’re reporting accurately, okay?

Oh, and Kevin Underwood? Fry in hell, buddy.

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Happy Heaster!

Mr. Dump and Junior and I wish you all a very Happy Heaster, as the toy rabbit we once saw at CVS a dozen years ago used to say. “Happy Heaster!” There was no mistaking the extra “H” so we always use it. That makes out Easter wishes more specialer than everyone else’s, don’t you think?

The Easter Bunny didn’t miss out house at all. He really shouldn’t have brought so much gum, I think. I don’t know if he noticed that he brought so much, but there you go. I hope Junior starts chewing it soon.

It’s a lovely day, if windy. I was going to wear sandals but I think my toes might be a bit cold. But maybe we need to sacrifice comfort for looking fabu. I’ll let you know.

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This Day Is Going to Drag

I have the day off tomorrow, making this a short week. Today is my Friday. Do you know long this day is going to drag on? Yes, that long.

I’m also very hungry and lunch is very far away. What on earth is going on with me? Am I running in a different time zone – something located out in the middle of the Atlantic ocean?

Plans for the long weekend, if I had nothing else going on, had unlimited cash available and could do several item simultaniously:

  • Replace the wooden picket fencing we have with some of that nice vinyl stuff. I don’t know if I’ll be able to do it myself so maybe this bullet point would just be to pick out the replacement fencing.
  • Pull together a big bag of clothes Junior has outgrown and give them to mom to process (she knows people that she passes some of it along to, and the rest we bring to Ginny’s).
  • Demolish the rest of the dirty laundry pile
  • Roto-till the side yard and reseed that sucker with something hearty that can handle being in full sun.
  • Put in an underground sprinkler system
  • Fertilize the lawn with something other than dog poo
  • Train the dog to heel when he goes for a walk.
  • Clean the tub, or pay someone to clean the tub
  • Wash the kitchen floor, or pay someone to wash the kitchen floor
  • Get my hair done (I actually have an appointment for that one for Saturday)

Knowing me, the only one I’ll finish (hell, start) is the last one because I have an appointment booked for it.

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