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Family Friendly Comedy Contains Suckage

I have Sirius radio in my car. It came ‘free’ with the new car (unless you think spending tens of thousands of dollars on the car should be considered part of the price of satellite radio) and I adore it. I really love just a handful of stations, but I love them so deeply that I’ll probably consider paying real cash money to keep the service when my six months are up.

As I’ve mentioned before, I’m a huge Opie and Anthony fan. I used to listed to Howard when he was free and on WBCN. We’re talking ages ago, around the time his movie came out. I’ve been listening to O&A since they took over Howard’s slot on BCN. However, I like them so much more that I actually bought and paid for the little Sirius app for my iPhone to listen to them. So that’s what I listen to on my commute these days, but that station goes OFF whenever the kid is in the car.

We were listening to on of my other stations when a commercial came on for “family-friendly” comedy on channel 105. Okay, that’s cool, we love comedy! But oh my word, most of it is just painful and unfunny. And I’ve now heard the same long boring monologue about glass being liquid twice in the same week. I thought I was listening to NPR. It was painful. I wanted to drive into a tree to make it stop.

They have lots of southern comics, and Christian comics, and olde tyme comedy bits. One of the great pleasures of this station turns out to be Mitch Hedberg and Stephen Wright – God bless them for having clean material. Of course, all this does it make me angry that Mitch is dead and I won’t be able to hear any more of his absolutely brilliant work.

But anyway, back to the family-friendly Laugh USA channel. We heard two monologues today on the way home from lunch. Finally, Junior turns to us and says “Can’t we listen to the channel with the swears so that we’ll hear something funny?” Amen, little man. Another couple of years and I won’t even hesitate. But why is it to hard for this channel to find funny material that can be played in the car with a 6th grader?

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Fake Horse Noises R Us

I sent Junior and Mr. Dump out to get some tulips for me on Saturday, to kill time while I was getting my eyes checked. (Some kind of infection, causing sight in my right eye to be blurry, making reading anything a horrific experience.) So when they came back to pick me up they had… a coconut. Oh. Okay. So no tulips, then?

On Easter Sunday, Mr. Dump and The Amazing Bob (shout out to long-time readers there, eh? That’s dump material circa 1997!) worked with my dad to get the coconut open. Then The Amazing Bob and I got all the meat out of it. (We later grated it up, put it in the oven with some powdered sugar, mixed it with melted chocolate we got by double-boiling some Hebert’s candy bars, making the worst-tasting coconut chocolate treats ever created on the face of the earth. My candy-making aspirations went down the drain, friends).

All of that hard work was so Junior could duplicate the horse galloping noises from the movie Monty Python and the Holy Grail. God, I love that kid.

p.s. Oh, right, you saw tulips in Saturday’s actual blog entry, right? I had to go back out with them and buy them myself. For some reason, they never saw the big container of cut tulips.

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