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Building 19 Used Car Salesmen Supplies

On the off chance that you are looking for the “perfect” super ugly jacket to complete that zombie used car salesman costume you’ve been working on, Building 19 has a rack of some of the ugliest jackets I’ve seen in 30 years. Attached is a photo of my son modeling the “blue and peach striped 100% polyester” special. There is some major ugly on this rack (and the sign actually says “ugly jackets” for Halloween). Five bucks each, no questions asked. (We bought two. The red and black polyester hounds tooth makes my eyes water.)

Super Ugly Jacket on Cute Model

Full disclosure: We went in there to look for a suit for my son’s magician costume. He wanted a tux, I said I wasn’t buying him one. On the “real” suit rack, right at the end, would you believe they had a “former rental” tux jacket with satin lapels for $20, and behind that a table with tux shirts (!) for $5? And the thing fits him like he was fitted for it. This place is better than the Salvation Army!

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Zombie Party!

I really wish I had written a zombie novel. If I had, you would all want to read it because it’s the week before Halloween and that’s gotta be the busiest week for zombie novel reading, right? Maybe if I get started on it right now I would have it finished so that you could all read it. I would make a kindle edition for you, because I know that you are some kind of crazy technology addict. And for the people I don’t like, I will just mimeograph a copy for you, but not give it to you until after they don’t smell good any more.

That will teach you.

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Shot Time

I get a flu shot tomorrow, but not the piggy or the swan flu shot. This is just regular old, “nobody cares about me because I don’t have a cool name and make the papers” flu shot. I am just hoping to get through the day and maybe not have any side effects from the flu shot. Like, say, the flu.

I was in a room today with a woman who sounded like she had gargled with Cup ‘O Virus. Thanks SO MUCH for being such a dedicated employee, and for entering the little piece of heaven that was the windowless and airless computer lab I was housed in. We all appreciated those noises you were making with your sinuses and your throat.

So if I DO get sick, I’m going to assume it was because of her, and not because of the flu shot. Unless it would get me more time off to say it was from the shot, in which case it most certainly was.

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Weathergirl Jody

When I left work today, I looked up at the sky and the sun was hidden behind a kind of misty fog. Normally that means “snow is coming” but I said to myself “well, that’s not possible so I guess I’m not as good a weathergirl as I thought.” But then I just read that it’s snowing in CT and headed this way. So suck on that, Accuweather! I predicted it without fancy computer equipment!

Wait.

Snow. In October.

Why am I happy about this?

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Family Friendly Comedy Contains Suckage

I have Sirius radio in my car. It came ‘free’ with the new car (unless you think spending tens of thousands of dollars on the car should be considered part of the price of satellite radio) and I adore it. I really love just a handful of stations, but I love them so deeply that I’ll probably consider paying real cash money to keep the service when my six months are up.

As I’ve mentioned before, I’m a huge Opie and Anthony fan. I used to listed to Howard when he was free and on WBCN. We’re talking ages ago, around the time his movie came out. I’ve been listening to O&A since they took over Howard’s slot on BCN. However, I like them so much more that I actually bought and paid for the little Sirius app for my iPhone to listen to them. So that’s what I listen to on my commute these days, but that station goes OFF whenever the kid is in the car.

We were listening to on of my other stations when a commercial came on for “family-friendly” comedy on channel 105. Okay, that’s cool, we love comedy! But oh my word, most of it is just painful and unfunny. And I’ve now heard the same long boring monologue about glass being liquid twice in the same week. I thought I was listening to NPR. It was painful. I wanted to drive into a tree to make it stop.

They have lots of southern comics, and Christian comics, and olde tyme comedy bits. One of the great pleasures of this station turns out to be Mitch Hedberg and Stephen Wright – God bless them for having clean material. Of course, all this does it make me angry that Mitch is dead and I won’t be able to hear any more of his absolutely brilliant work.

But anyway, back to the family-friendly Laugh USA channel. We heard two monologues today on the way home from lunch. Finally, Junior turns to us and says “Can’t we listen to the channel with the swears so that we’ll hear something funny?” Amen, little man. Another couple of years and I won’t even hesitate. But why is it to hard for this channel to find funny material that can be played in the car with a 6th grader?

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