The Big DumpTruck

Throwing Little Thought Pebbles at Your Windshield Since 1996

Month: June, 2006

Almost Time to Bid My Phone Goodbye

I have beaten my phone to death. The keyboard is hanging by a thread (or literally, by a thread of gummy glue). There are scratches on the face of it that make it hard to read text at time. It has dents and dings I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy’s car.

But I’ve been holding out, because I kept thinking
a) I can’t afford to replace my phone right now, and
b) maybe the next generation SideKick is coming out soon?

So the next generation SideKick was released this week. Mr. Dump and I figured out that I would get my next thousand hour bonus (a week’s paycheck) by the time the bill for a new phone came in. So I ordered an upgrade to the SideKick 3. This morning, I couldn’t swivel the phone shut. Possibly in protest, I think.

My order is in, but response has been so overwhelming that UPS can’t keep caught up on tracking the damned things for them right now. (On the support boards one person said her phone arrived, was in her hand, but the UPS sight still said it couldn’t track her package.) In the T-Mobile system my order is listed as “pending” which may mean that it went out yesterday. It may mean that it didn’t yet. They couldn’t actually tell me.

You’ll be the first ones to hear about it when it arrives, though. And we’ll have to have a suitable ceremony to lay the old one to rest. I may just keep the falling-out of the phone keyboard just to hang up in my cubicle.

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Mark Harmon, Call Me

I had a dream that I hooked up with Mark Harmon last night. Excellent dream. He was the 20 years younger version (the current version ain’t bad either) and I guess I was having a good biorhythm day. Or something.

I hope to have a similar dream tonight, with some other ex-People Magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive person. (In my dream, that’s how I justified the rendezvous with whoever was with me. Go me!)

The rest of the dream was just bizarre (like that wasn’t) and involved lost luggage and/or shoes and/or a bicycle at a hotel. I am definitely pro-more Mark Harmon and less lost bicycles. In case Adam is trying to come up with his next poll over at Universal Hub (link is on the right, I’m using my phone to type this).

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Vobo’s Words of Wisdom

A friend of mine (via the TopFive contributors mailing list) gave us the following words of wisdom this morning. To put it into context, as with any mailing list, there are always heated discussions. Yesterday and today the hot button topic turned out to be based on something I posted. Asked what, if anything, you would change in professional sports today, I responded that I would put in some kind of ability to use instant replay in baseball, for those extremely questionable calls (was he or wasn’t he tagged out, or did the ball hit the lip of the Green Monster and bounce out and then back in?) In a controlled manner, like football, where you only get to ask for so many reviews.

One person was vehemently against instant replay, stating that mistakes are just part of the game and it makes it interesting. There was a response that to make it interesting we should just pull people with no skills off the streets to officiate. Vobo suggested using hobos. He later added the following:

“I once found a hobo softball player figure – with a ripped shirt and a can of beer in his ungloved hand – that was the same size and had the same color base as the wise men in my mom’s manger scene. Every manger should have a drunken softball hobo. Especially since Godzillas, army men and rubber cockroaches are immediately distinguishable. Same with the Santa climbing down the manger’s ersatz chimney, but I think that’s a nice touch.”

Next Christmas I am SO sneaking people into my mom’s manger scene.

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Mom Says I Don’t Hafta Go To Work

Oh man, I wish that line worked. Does anyone like getting up on a dreary day? I guess it would be worse if it was still dark out. Why yes, I did depress myself this morning by remembering that we’re now on the downward slope of morning light. Sure, it won’t be noticeable until another month or so, but we hit the longest day. Now it’s only a matter of time (okay, months) before it’s all dark again. Sheesh, I hate that. Why can’t the summer solstice happen at the end of July or something? Why so early?

(Gee, I sound cranky, don’t I? I’m going to write it off to PMS.)

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A Link For You

A present for you…

Http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/aw.php

I only wish I had been the one who created it. (Safe for work unless you work for a soda company, I guess.)

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2nd Time the Charm?

Okay, we made another attempt to do the “Day After the Last Day of School” trip to Crane’s Beach. The last time I went was in 2004, and it was 58 degrees at the beach. It was very unpleasant. Here is what I looked like back them:

Today it was 80-ish at the beach, but the water was 55 degrees, so it was REALLY FOGGY. To the point where we just had to laugh at how we couldn’t see anything. Got a shot to share with you:

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Goodness, How Many Days Has It Been?

I apologize for my scarcity. I’m making a career detour this month and have been up to my eyeballs finishing my the stuff I’m working on before my last day, the 30th. I will be with the same company, in a different role. I’m VERY excited about this change, even though I’m sad to be leaving behind some very cool coworkers. But you gotta do what you gotta do, right?

Today is Junior’s last day of 2nd grade. I tried to sort of hold him in a pose that would prevent him from growing any more, but it wasn’t working. Then I pulled out a tape measure and showed him what 21 inches looks like. “That is how you started. Can you see why I think you’re getting too big?” I think he was amused to see how little he was. Of course, at the time we thought Mr. 8 pounds 12 ounces and 21 inches was huge. How naive we were back then.

Time to take more video of the boy so that when he’s another foot taller I can just sit in a dark room and look back fondly on these days when he was “little.”

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Setting the Record Straight

I have to defend Fluff. Some moron at the State House has taken it upon himself to start a personal crusade against God’s favorite food, Marshmallow Fluff.

I buy it, and not for Junior. He doesn’t really eat peanut butter.

I buy it for me.

The part I need to set straight is the “sugar and chemicals” summary statements. Sugar, sure, but no chemicals. Here are the ingredients:
Corn syrup
Sugar
Dried egg white
Vanillin.

That’s it. No fat, no sodium. 15g of carbs, 9g of sugars.

So lets look at grape jelly. I have some Smuckers. Grape juice, high fructose corn syrup, corn syrup, pectin, citric acid and sodium citrate. That gives us no fat, 5mg of sodium, 13g of carbs, 12g of sugars.

So when will they be banning jelly? Side by side, Fluff is “better” for you.

stupid humans, have you nothing better to do? I have an idea – take the money you would spend trying to get this passed and add it back to the school lunch budgets. I can’t even feed my family a healthy meal on the pittance the cafeteria managers have to work with. That’s the REAL problem.

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“I Heart My Wife”

Okay, so I saw this bumper sticker on a truck this morning. I can’t fathom a guy voluntarily putting it on. Maybe the wife snuck out in the middle of the night and did it when he was sleeping. Or else it’s his punishment for some really horrible thing he did.

I don’t think I’d make Mr. Dump put one of those on his car. Not that he would. Maybe I should ask him.

[As a side note, it might have been a woman driving the truck. Which made me jump to the conclusion that it was a lesbian couple (and that would make perfect sense because it would be a political statement AND the type of thing a woman would be more likely to be willing to put on a car.) Of course, it could have been the guy’s wife borrowing his truck. So many questions.]

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"I Heart My Wife"

Okay, so I saw this bumper sticker on a truck this morning. I can’t fathom a guy voluntarily putting it on. Maybe the wife snuck out in the middle of the night and did it when he was sleeping. Or else it’s his punishment for some really horrible thing he did.

I don’t think I’d make Mr. Dump put one of those on his car. Not that he would. Maybe I should ask him.

[As a side note, it might have been a woman driving the truck. Which made me jump to the conclusion that it was a lesbian couple (and that would make perfect sense because it would be a political statement AND the type of thing a woman would be more likely to be willing to put on a car.) Of course, it could have been the guy’s wife borrowing his truck. So many questions.]

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