Here, for your viewing pleasure, a short play I call “Imaginary Conversation Between Man and Dog.” You can feel free to act this out in the privacy of your own home.
Mr. Dump: Okay, time to get in the car.
Phantom: Screw you.
Mr. Dump: What? It’s time to go to doggie daycare!
Phantom: Screw you.
Mr. Dump: This is because of Monday, isn’t it? Don’t worry, we’re not going to the vet this time.
Phantom: Screw you.
Mr. Dump: Look, we had to have them removed. That guy from the Price is Right said so.
Phantom: Screw you.
Mr. Dump: And we had no idea they were going to pull two of your baby teeth. While you were there.
Phantom: Screw you.
Mr. Dump: We assume it’s because your adult teeth were coming in. They don’t remove things for no reason.
Phantom: Screw you.
Mr. Dump: And you only have to wear that cone on your head because you won’t leave your stitches alone…
Phantom: Screw you.
Fin
