The Big DumpTruck

Throwing Little Thought Pebbles at Your Windshield Since 1996

Month: December, 2003

The Great Christmas Carol Immersion

Junior is up to 4 versions of A Christmas Carol. He’s got the story down cold so that regardless of what version it is, he knows what’s coming next. I know, because I quizzed him. (“What’s next?” “The ghost with the chains who tells him about the other three ghosts” “Good boy!”)

We were watching a House of Mouse DVD and it included Mickey’s Christmas Carol (bonus!). What’s funny about that is that he asked me to turn off the Reginald Owen version that I had been watching to watch the Disney DVD, not knowing what was in store. He doesn’t really like the ghost of Christmas Yet to Come, but I don’t think you’re supposed to, given that Tiny Tim AND Scrooge are both dead in the future. (Tiny Tim dying, considering the kids they get to play him in the live versions, isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Cripes, is it that hard to cast someone who isn’t annoying in that role? Please, the kid in the Albert Finney version does NOT sing like an angel. And he seems pretty healthy, other than the bum leg.)

Actually, in the Muppet Version, Junior was VERY freaked out by the Ghost of Christmas Present, who is so big that when we first see him it’s just his giant eye looking through the door of Scrooge’s bedroom. He HATED that part. Loved the ghost, but HATED the eye in the door. Now he knows that other versions don’t have that. I have the George C. Scott version on DVD, the Henry Winkler version on VHS, and we haven’t seen the Alistair Sim version yet. Think he’ll let me squeeze in one more before the weekend?


So Wait, We Have to Eat?

In some dusty corner way way back in the part of my brain where I store the lyrics to the commercial for Digger the Dog (“Digger the Dog, Digger he goes with you, when you explore”) I had a yellow sticky note to myself that said “Christmas Dinner”.

Now that my sister and I both have kids that are no longer babies, we don’t get together on Christmas Day. Part of me finds this incredibly sad, as I am such a freak for getting together with family. I know growing up we had to go to both Grandparents’ houses, one in the afternoon, one in the evening, but they basically lived in the same town. My sister lives about 20 minutes from here, so it’s a little more of a trek for her and the gang. Anyway, up until the year before last, we still went to my parents’ for Christmas breakfast because Christmas Eve was spent at my Aunt’s House. Kids, of course, turn that all upside down, and we started doing Christmas Eve at Mom’s, and then I invite Mom and Dad to have Christmas dinner with us because we live in the same town. Last year we had that massive snowstorm on Christmas day, so we didn’t get together for lunch. I actually spent most of the day handling snow removal, if I recall correctly.

This year I sort of forgot that we don’t go to Mom and Dad’s on Christmas day, and that if I didn’t want to have a can of soup for Christmas dinner, I actually have to plan something, buy the ingredients, and make it. D’oh! So yes, stupid me will be going to the grocery store tonight or tomorrow (or sending Mr. Dump) to get some kind of roast (pork? beef?), potatoes, carrots, etc., and all the ingredients for green bean casserole (Ya, baby!). I called mom today and invited them over (cause, like, why would they assume they were invited if I didn’t actually invite them?) Whether they come over or not, I mean, we have to have something that day. I feel so silly for not even thinking about it. I’ll also extend the invitation to my sister’s family, because that’s the polite thing to do, which would be cool because I think the best thing about the holidays is having a house full of people. Some people may like the “oh, we’re just going to be our little family” but not me. It’s this time of year that I wish I had more kids, because that would take care of the problem.

Anyway, I’m rambling. Happy 2 days until Christmas!


Where’s the Moisture

I have chapped lips to beat the band. They weren’t this bad yesterday, but man, it’s like the skin was replaced with a shingle off my roof. I happened to find some Aquaphor in my backpack (do you call them that? Backpack. I wanted to write napsack but then I wasn’t sure if it was spelled knapsack and that looked silly, and then I realized the whole word is silly. So backpack it is.)

What was I saying? Oh, between the clear Almay Pure Tints (if it’s clear, how can it be a tint? Hmmm?) and the Aquaphor, maybe, just maybe, they’ll get back into skin form sometime before the end of the week. I’ll keep you posted.


A Few Random Things

1. Nobody in my family likes green bean casserole, so I haven’t had it in years. I’m going to make some for me, and eat it while I search for clues that I’m adopted.

2. I can’t remember what 2 was supposed to be.

3. We made reindeer food today, so what more could possibly be left to prepare?

4. I talked Junior into watching 2 different versions of a Christmas Carol with me. This has helped me start to break his current greedy/selfish state that he’d best grow out of *very* quickly.

5. I just can’t fall asleep if my feet are cold. I’d like to thank the person who invented socks.


I Wish I’d Been at the Pitch Meeting…

We have Mr. Rogers on here. Here is a quick summary of the neighborhood of makebelieve segment:

Mr. McPheely delivers a box of fortune cookies to King Friday but King Friday wasn’t impressed and told Mr. McPheely he could just leave them for others. Well, the assistant mayor opened one and it was the special silver fortune cookie and out popped a fortune cookie man who only spoke spanish.

Yes, I know.


Fake Games

Do you remember Calvin and Hobbes games where they would just make up rules as they played, and they both seemed like they totally understood?

Junior is doing that to us right now in the car (why yes, I’m writing this from the car!) We’ve been assigned numbers, and we have to remember our numbers because if he calls our number we have to handle the mission. But the numbers we get can be changed if someone is unavailable. Or something. Junior just said “I just got one of the levers and I got 14 points…we’re going to get 1000 points because I have speed shoes. If we get there in 50 minutes, we get another thousand points. If we get there in 60 we get a kazillion.”

I couldn’t make this up.


Whew, Feeling Better

You can actually smell smoke if you open my wallet. It’s coming from my debit card. One good thing about not having any credit cards is that as of December 26th, I don’t have to worry about all the credit card statements showing up wrapped with shiny paper and bright ribbons. If I didn’t have the money to buy something, I didn’t. Not that I didn’t spend my fair share in an attempt to keep the economy running smooth and boost the Dow over 10,000 (please, any one of you would have done the same).

So tomorrow is “what can we wrap in front of Junior” day. Oh, and I told him it’s clean the house day because “you don’t want Santa to see our messy house, do you?”


Less Than a Week

Aaaaaeyyyyyyiiiiieeee! Oh, wait, did I say that out loud?

6 days until Christmas, folks, as Junior will likely point out when he wakes up. Two days ago he asked if he could open up my present(s) to him. “Uh, no.” Can’t fault the kid for trying.

I think what I will miss most in 7 days is the radio station going back to their regular playlist. I hate their regular playlist. But do they listen to me? No. Someday, when I rule the world, they’ll listen. They’ll all listen!


The Blank Page

Dear Everyone Who Has Things For Me to Do, (and that includes ME):

I am but one person.

Thank you,



The Things I Promised

Okay, here are the story and the picture. Which do you want first? Okay, first the story.



On the very first Christmas, it was really foggy and snow whizzed over the town.

The people were frightened.

The people bought hot chocolate before the wind grew stronger. The snow hadn’t seen the town so busy before, so it stopped! Then the sun came out. The people were happy! And then it was a very nice day.


And here’s the picture, sent by loyal Dump reader Linda P. This is her kitty, and apparently it has staked out this location for naps. I’ll let you guys provide captions.

Christmas Kitty Photo