Getting nowhere fast? Want to see what Microsoft Word thinks of your novel?

Put your whole novel in one word file, then click Tools>Autosummarize. I like to keep my summary to less than 2% under 100 words, and have it open in a new document. Eye opening and pointless, it is! It just grabs random sentences or fragments, and builds a new document.

My summary of about the first 12700 words or so:

As if anyone would ever need a lawsuit.

If I can be honest here, I have a little crush on the Fresh Fruit Man. Becoming the Larry Flynt of the house-to-house mobile retail industry.

"Dana?"

"Right. Reading a book? Right?

Especially if I am writing in the first person. Funny stuff. Too many sick people. I mean, didn't pirates buy houses on, say, the ocean? My house, owned by a sea captain? I wonder if his ghost haunts the property? "I'm selling Girl Scout Cookies. I guess if someone tells you there might be pirate treasure buried in your backyard, or under your house. I suppose it would be a small price to pay if it helped me locate a big old pile of pirate treasure, eh? I think if I did, I would never ever wear clean clothes. I don't remember if we actually hung it or not, or if my mother was annoyed with me. I bought this house quite a few years ago. Give me a little time, though.