The Big Dump Truck

A Product I Would Never Get

I got the oddest thing in the mail at work this week. Aside from a big Dr. Seuss book (see below). I pulled out an envelope from my mail slot and I was asked to "Beam Up for Big Savings." That's right. It was the mail I was waiting for: A no-annual-fee Star Trek MasterCard®, the one I've always wanted!

Why me? I don't even watch the show? What did I get at work that put me on this mailing list. Oh, must be my status as "internet geek." I did go to a trade show recently. Of course I must be a fan. Silly. This got me to thinking. What if I got the card? I mean, 5.9% a.p.r., even if it's ony for 6 months, is better than 17.5.

I think the thing that stopped me is that I couldn't imagine actually using the card. Handing it to a clerk in an expensive clothing store. Or using it to pay for a meal with a client. Right as you're about to close the deal and pay for the meal, the whole thing goes down the toilet because Mr. CEO doesn't take you seriously.

As a side note, don't you think a spell checker attached to an HTML editing tool should recognize the word "geek"?

Things Not to Do In a Cafe

I told my sister Deb that I would be mentioning her husband Trooper Bob in this week's Dump Truck. Here it is Deb! I told you I would!
Bob and Deb took a quick spin down to Tatnuck Booksellers in Worcester last Saturday. It had been ages since I'd been, and sometimes you have to go to places like that just to breath in the air. They have good air. I found a couple of things I really wanted (one of which I can't mention here because it's going to be a Secret Santa present for someone next year and that person might be among the legions of fans who actually stop by and read the big dump truck. By the way, thank you for that.) Anyhoo, part of the reason for the visit was to go to the little restaurant in the store and get a cup of coffee and some dessert. Deb and Keith staked out a table while I paid for my purchases. Always an impulse shopper, I saw that they were selling those little "snappers" that we used to have as kids...you know, they look like little paper tadpole and when you throw them on the ground they make a snapping noise. I hadn't seen them for years, so 49 cents seemed like a bargain.

By the time I got to the table Bob, Deb and Keith were already settled in. I got my coffee at the bar (unlimited pour-your-own) and sat down to show them my purchases. Keith realized he'd added too much sugar to his coffee and got up to adjust it. At that time I pulled out the snappers to show Deb, gently took them out of the box. They are in a plastic bag full of sawdust or pencil shavings or something like that. Bob GRABBED the bag out of my hand and before anyone could say anything, he took it and threw it down on the glass-topped (read: hard) table. The bag exploded with a loud bang. The entire cafe area and a large part of this warehouse-turned bookstore got very quiet. Deb and I sat with our mouths open. Pencil shavings covered the table.

I have to say that Bob seemed genuinely surprised that they had exploded. His reasoning was that he thought nothing would happen because they were in the bag with the padding. I assume it didn't occur to him that the force he was using would simulate a drop to the ground. Deb and I immediately started to wipe up the dust and stuff while Keith returned with a "What on earth are you guys DOING over here?" You'll all be happy to hear we didn't get kicked out.

Book Clubs

The world must have been informed that I went to the Leominster Public Library last Saturday, because in the past few days I have received notices from two different book clubs! I haven't had a book club offer in over a year, and now two different ones think I'd be a good credit risk. Silly them. Actually, I am a loyal member of the Quality Paperback Book Club, which sells trade paperbacks (mostly) at seriously reduced prices. I'd quit but I have enough bonus points for at least two free books, so what they heck? Because I'm an extra-special member, I get an 800 number to use to call and tell them I don't want the monthly selection, instead of having to find a stamp and hope that the US Postal service will get the little card back before they load up a box with books I don't really want.

I've only missed cancelling the monthly selection twice in the past 4 or 5 years, and one of those times was apparently last month. I ended up with a collection of every Doctor Seuss books this week. Oh well, with 5 and 6 year old kids around every few weekends, I'm sure it will get used.

Yellow Belts

The Future Kickboxers of America gained two new members last week: my step-kids both received their yellow belts in Karate! Keith and I went to the test and watched them punch and kick their little hearts out. I hope to never be in a dangerous situation without one of them by my side!

Today's List
Books I'm Currently Reading (all at the same time)

• Downsize This - Michael Moore
• Sense & Sensibility - Jane Austen
• Inside Shots - Damien Bona

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