The Big DumpTruck

Mr. Dump has bad luck when he flies. Not when he flies with me, but typically when he flies on business. One time, the guy sitting next to him had a heart attack and died mid-flight. That was probably the worst of the bad experiences. He was so freaked out by the dead guy that he went into the airplane bathroom and passed out, wrenching his bad knee, making a bad situation even worse (for Mr. Dump anyway).

Yesterday he had a cross-country flight and dropped a can of Dr. Pepper on himself, so he had to sit for 2.5 hours waiting for jeans to dry. I'm guessing it was fairly unpleasant. But worse, he got stuck sitting next to a woman who talked to herself. A lot. That's a long time to be stuck next to someone who more than likely has some psychological problems. Ms. Chatty also didn't do well during the approach to the airport, which was fairly turbulent. She asked Mr. Dump for his airsickness bag because there wasn't one in her seat pocket.

Mr. Dump doesn't do well around people who are throwing up.

Ms. Chatty announced to her invisible friends, "Last time I did this I used 2 bags." I can only imagine the look of horror on his face as she said it, while trying to ignore the fact that she was throwing up next to him. This sentence was followed by "When it go to this point I had to switch."

You cannot imagine how hard I was laughing when he told me this story. Luckily she only needed the one bag and Mr. Dump didn't join her. But God, can you even imagine?